hmm... like yoke, don't know why, i seem to forget what i want to blog... but when i think abt it, i remember... so here i am... i have taken over this teacher who teaches a pair of sisters piano... and i have to break the bad news to them, that they failed their grade 2 and grade 4 practical exams.... the feeling is so bad that i could not take it... i really don't want them to fail the next grade... the thing is, i'm lacking in confidence... i know the reason, cos, i really think that without some help, i don't trust my judgement in analysing such a high grade song... and the sucky thing is... i don't want them to fail because of me... sigh... don't really enjoy going for piano lessons now... feeling stressed as saturday nears.... aargh!!!
seem to have things i wanna do... even if i have done it, i seem to get the feeling that i can do more... why?? aargh!!! sux.... don't wanna have this feeling.... but don't know what to do to get rid of it too.... can someone help me?
hmm.... sometimes, i really don't know how i'm suppose to see things... so, not really seeing it... perhaps, that's good in a way... hiaz, don't know... see how it goes.... that's all! shall enjoy my day tmr!
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
Monday, January 16, 2006
STAY HAPPY!
was talking to yoke and i realised that i have not blogged for quite a while... it's not really good to discover life has been taken over by maple.... so, shall blog now!!!!
can forsee that the coming week will be a very busy one... marketing projects, family gatherings, friends gathering... hopefully, admist all, find time to maple, and tutorials... which is aargh! quite worried abt stats... really must read the textbook, but not really looking forward to it, as it's quite alot... shall try tmr....
was being a model for my sister ytd... yeeks... it's really quite scary to have the attention on u all the time... don't know how the models get used to it.... well, i dun have to anyways...
studied in sch today with yoke.... hiaz, must really study more!!!!!
sigh, our mkting tutor sux... don't know what are we learning in mkting... nth to copy at all, must as well not do the stupid tutorial, since we are not getting any answers anyway... so stupid and irritating!!!! hiaz, feeling kind of bad, as yoke has transferred to my mkting class to get shitty tutors... hope things turn out better, but i seriously doubt so...
ppl are really weird some times... well, they just say what comes to their mind, ain't that really tactless.... and shows that u are really quite dumb in socialising with people, regardless of your academic achievements... whatever lar... just hope that the small satisfaction u get makes up for ur pathetic life....
was just talking to someone i met from maple... quite touched that he remembers that i played the piano.. its been more than a month since i talked to him... it's ppl like these that makes me hopeful abt the world, in a way....
this final wish to all out there... STAY HAPPY! i know that life sometimes seems so bleak and hopeless, and u wanna throw ur hands up in frustration... don't really know, but i choose not to really see things... that's really better!!! to all, stay happy!
can forsee that the coming week will be a very busy one... marketing projects, family gatherings, friends gathering... hopefully, admist all, find time to maple, and tutorials... which is aargh! quite worried abt stats... really must read the textbook, but not really looking forward to it, as it's quite alot... shall try tmr....
was being a model for my sister ytd... yeeks... it's really quite scary to have the attention on u all the time... don't know how the models get used to it.... well, i dun have to anyways...
studied in sch today with yoke.... hiaz, must really study more!!!!!
sigh, our mkting tutor sux... don't know what are we learning in mkting... nth to copy at all, must as well not do the stupid tutorial, since we are not getting any answers anyway... so stupid and irritating!!!! hiaz, feeling kind of bad, as yoke has transferred to my mkting class to get shitty tutors... hope things turn out better, but i seriously doubt so...
ppl are really weird some times... well, they just say what comes to their mind, ain't that really tactless.... and shows that u are really quite dumb in socialising with people, regardless of your academic achievements... whatever lar... just hope that the small satisfaction u get makes up for ur pathetic life....
was just talking to someone i met from maple... quite touched that he remembers that i played the piano.. its been more than a month since i talked to him... it's ppl like these that makes me hopeful abt the world, in a way....
this final wish to all out there... STAY HAPPY! i know that life sometimes seems so bleak and hopeless, and u wanna throw ur hands up in frustration... don't really know, but i choose not to really see things... that's really better!!! to all, stay happy!
Tuesday, January 10, 2006
yay!
haven't been blogging for a while.... firstly, wanna thanks the ppl who gave me presents!!
dear sis, hwee min and hui qi, yoke! jia ying! jh! thanks guys!
and the ppl who wish me happy bday!!! dear pei shan... mz, aunties!! thanks so much!
went causeway point and had swensen with my sister... the new year meal wasn't very nice... so, please don't eat it... we had apple crumble... which was not bad... but was damn full after that... essentially, had a nice time... but then, i poured my water on my sis... haha, clumsy poke am i...
went to charles and keith to buy shoes after that... but then, most of the outlets don't have my size and the colour of the shoes i want.... sigh!!!! just my luck....
went my aunty's hse to visit my baby cousin... she doesn't like me... haha, kids... but seriously, she's damn cute! miss her sometimes, but not close... had a fun time at my aunty's hse...!
maple is nice too... previously, lacked the motivation to train anymore... but then, got it back again... is that good or bad? doesn't sound good? ok ba... if i do actually plan my stuff carefully.. quite stupid... haha....
ok, that's all, nice weather!
dear sis, hwee min and hui qi, yoke! jia ying! jh! thanks guys!
and the ppl who wish me happy bday!!! dear pei shan... mz, aunties!! thanks so much!
went causeway point and had swensen with my sister... the new year meal wasn't very nice... so, please don't eat it... we had apple crumble... which was not bad... but was damn full after that... essentially, had a nice time... but then, i poured my water on my sis... haha, clumsy poke am i...
went to charles and keith to buy shoes after that... but then, most of the outlets don't have my size and the colour of the shoes i want.... sigh!!!! just my luck....
went my aunty's hse to visit my baby cousin... she doesn't like me... haha, kids... but seriously, she's damn cute! miss her sometimes, but not close... had a fun time at my aunty's hse...!
maple is nice too... previously, lacked the motivation to train anymore... but then, got it back again... is that good or bad? doesn't sound good? ok ba... if i do actually plan my stuff carefully.. quite stupid... haha....
ok, that's all, nice weather!
Friday, January 06, 2006
i like the friday today
u have your revenge... i truly hope u are happy in your heart... if this is what u want.... i have never done anything against my conscienc... and i know that if it makes u truly contented, have it your own way... i know that i wld just do my best for everything... and that... i dun wanna say anymore, because tears are now falling from my eyes.... i really didn't expect u to be this kind of person, i was truly wrong.... now that u make me see, u are the one who changed, not me... i have never changed at all... just u.... and i really wish that u can face life straight in the face.... up and alive.... because u are not what i thought u were....
sigh, life's like that rite? things come back to huant u... i don't even know when it started? perhaps, it has always been there.... huant me? what is huanting me? i don't even know.... i'm very sad now, not even gonna hide... no feelings, just utmost saddness.... i know i've never abandon u.... but u did, at most crucial moments.... and, it's just... let's not write anymore.... just that whatever u are doing, hope that u are truly happy....
yes, what's the point of hiding saddness? breaking up of something.... so simple rite? just words, no thoughts to what someone has done for u... just ur thought of that moment... it's really so easy and simple.... i'm caring so much, and trying... but the other party is not.... life still goes on rite? yes, i'm still me, and i know the person i am.... this faith will keep me going....
been crying many times today.... don't know why too... had a nice time today with yoke... tmr's her bday, and we went to eat LJS, and coffee bean for coffee... nice talking with her!!!!! we are getting real old.... hope that through age, we become mature?? more? but then, hiaz, don't we all wanna be young? but then, move forward, we will be truly happy one day....
my twin sis dyed her hair... a promise is always a promise.... hiaz.... hope the colour contrast comes out in a couple of days!
perhaps, i deserve all these things that i'm feeling now.... yes, God wants me to experience this somehow.... i don't see it all yet... but i will one day...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOKE!
sigh, life's like that rite? things come back to huant u... i don't even know when it started? perhaps, it has always been there.... huant me? what is huanting me? i don't even know.... i'm very sad now, not even gonna hide... no feelings, just utmost saddness.... i know i've never abandon u.... but u did, at most crucial moments.... and, it's just... let's not write anymore.... just that whatever u are doing, hope that u are truly happy....
yes, what's the point of hiding saddness? breaking up of something.... so simple rite? just words, no thoughts to what someone has done for u... just ur thought of that moment... it's really so easy and simple.... i'm caring so much, and trying... but the other party is not.... life still goes on rite? yes, i'm still me, and i know the person i am.... this faith will keep me going....
been crying many times today.... don't know why too... had a nice time today with yoke... tmr's her bday, and we went to eat LJS, and coffee bean for coffee... nice talking with her!!!!! we are getting real old.... hope that through age, we become mature?? more? but then, hiaz, don't we all wanna be young? but then, move forward, we will be truly happy one day....
my twin sis dyed her hair... a promise is always a promise.... hiaz.... hope the colour contrast comes out in a couple of days!
perhaps, i deserve all these things that i'm feeling now.... yes, God wants me to experience this somehow.... i don't see it all yet... but i will one day...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOKE!
Thursday, January 05, 2006
tired
it's kind of weird blogging in sch... cos u kind of imagine everyone's looking at what u are typing... then again... it's just my fertile imagination.... whatever... bored now, trying to add drop but it starts at 1230, which is like... ok, now i've add drop... which is quite an experience... anyway, think i'll still have my wednesday free... yes!!!!
now, it's not so bad, for my class, because i'll still have farmiliar ppl with me.... went to the wrong FM class today... which was quite stupid.. luckily, there's nice ppl there who directed me to the right class.... and FM, was quite an experience... i can forsee the problems tt's gonna come with it... sigh... work hard? but i don't feel like working hard this week, because it's only the first week... and i have 3 tutorials on monday... hurray, if i can actually complete them on time... the thing is, for stats, things do not really come that naturally... and how to maple, if i'm doing tutorials... and i don't come home that early today.... aargh!! so many things to consider... going out during the weekends too.... WHY?? do i have to face this during the first week.... sianz.... sch is not fun...
i'm terribly slpy right now... sianz... nothing to do... and there's no maple... sigh... and there's abt 1.5 hr to my lecture.... sianz... i don't feel like doing anything today!!!!!
many conflicts... and the thing is, i've already tried my best... no energy to think abt it... just know that my conscienc is clear....
I HATE SCH!
yoke here to play and to talk and to crap and to cry and to lots of things which I won't tell you guys. MUAHAHAHAHA... we are all turning 20... welcome to the twenties club. NO more eighTEENs or nineTEENS... No longer TEENS... farewell... but be HAPPY!
that's courtesy of yoke
bye guys! wanna go slp le... i hope to enjoy mkting later....
now, it's not so bad, for my class, because i'll still have farmiliar ppl with me.... went to the wrong FM class today... which was quite stupid.. luckily, there's nice ppl there who directed me to the right class.... and FM, was quite an experience... i can forsee the problems tt's gonna come with it... sigh... work hard? but i don't feel like working hard this week, because it's only the first week... and i have 3 tutorials on monday... hurray, if i can actually complete them on time... the thing is, for stats, things do not really come that naturally... and how to maple, if i'm doing tutorials... and i don't come home that early today.... aargh!! so many things to consider... going out during the weekends too.... WHY?? do i have to face this during the first week.... sianz.... sch is not fun...
i'm terribly slpy right now... sianz... nothing to do... and there's no maple... sigh... and there's abt 1.5 hr to my lecture.... sianz... i don't feel like doing anything today!!!!!
many conflicts... and the thing is, i've already tried my best... no energy to think abt it... just know that my conscienc is clear....
I HATE SCH!
yoke here to play and to talk and to crap and to cry and to lots of things which I won't tell you guys. MUAHAHAHAHA... we are all turning 20... welcome to the twenties club. NO more eighTEENs or nineTEENS... No longer TEENS... farewell... but be HAPPY!
that's courtesy of yoke
bye guys! wanna go slp le... i hope to enjoy mkting later....
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
pain
today is the first day of sch... and i actually slept during stats lecture... well, don't know why, i can't slp last night... kept waking up.... sianz.... perhaps, i'm slping too early.... that's why can't get to slp properly... and think that i'm afraid that i will miss the alarm somehow, woke up a few times... yes, i'm mad....
gonna start working hard... got the mood, but not starting yet... also dunno why lar... just know that it's inevitable....
didn't get to talk much to yoke today... hopefully, the screwed up timetable will not be in the way...
went with mag to creative and then clementi to buy books... really walk alot, under the hot sun, hopefully, i will not fall sick....
sianz.... sianz... sianz
body really aching like shit...
gonna start working hard... got the mood, but not starting yet... also dunno why lar... just know that it's inevitable....
didn't get to talk much to yoke today... hopefully, the screwed up timetable will not be in the way...
went with mag to creative and then clementi to buy books... really walk alot, under the hot sun, hopefully, i will not fall sick....
sianz.... sianz... sianz
body really aching like shit...
Sunday, January 01, 2006
HAPPY 2006!
i'm super sleepy now!!! just came back from a BBQ from my uncle's office... it's his annual office BBQ for the countdown... and i strongly suspect my sleepiness is from the beer and red wine... sigh.... i just can't resist acholic drinks during celebrations... haha... initially, i was my usual awkward self... i don't really wanna go mix and BBQ, cos, i don't really know the ppl well? but after awhile, it's ok, just went to BBQ and have quite some fun... the thing abt BBQ is the smell.... other than tt, we all cook together, esp. my cousins, the kids... they just play along and have fun... so innocent and just plain playful... when was the last time i did that? well, actually quite recently... but then, all these is just some parts for me while for the kids, they can have alot of time doing that... so much envy!!!!!!
ok, i should have continued blogging, as usual, was distracted... wanna talk abt my reflections of the past year... and i will do it the tradition way... labling each heading... haha...
LOVE
i've done alot of stupid things regarding this... don't really care to elaborate, but that this is really a waste of time and pretty worthless... do i regret? a bit, i guess, but i got a wake up call because of this... and kind of put me in my place.... so, glad in a way... but at a high price... after all this, i've resolved that this is not important right now, and that i will concentrate on my studies... what the heck, i've come so far being alone... i can live my life alone!
CAREER
it's really pretty screwed right now... results sux and all... firstly, talking abt tuition... it's alright, in the sense, that my cousins did pretty well... i just hope that i can be more patient and give them a better perspective... chinese is still a struggle, but i shall try my best... piano, well, let just say that i have many students having exams this year... and some of them actually fail the previous grade... kind of make me nervous, and really stressed.... but i shall try my best... hopefully, can present a good report card....
INTERNET
this is closely linked to MAPLE... met lots of nice ppl there... and the sad thing out of this, i let it overcome my life... i look back and realise that i did not read any useful books, article of any sort... just maple... it's really sad... not that maple is bad, just that.... it can really take away alot of the realities... and the ppl i meet... nice.... this also includes online chatting, which, is really sucky... gonna cut down on it....
FAMILY
well, gald that all my family members are well and happy in a way... as long as we get along together, there's really nothing more i wld wish for...
FRIENDS
thank the lord for yoke, hwee min, hui qi & pei shan.... thanks for always listening to me....
that's abt it... hope the coming year will be equally great... in a way?
ok, i should have continued blogging, as usual, was distracted... wanna talk abt my reflections of the past year... and i will do it the tradition way... labling each heading... haha...
LOVE
i've done alot of stupid things regarding this... don't really care to elaborate, but that this is really a waste of time and pretty worthless... do i regret? a bit, i guess, but i got a wake up call because of this... and kind of put me in my place.... so, glad in a way... but at a high price... after all this, i've resolved that this is not important right now, and that i will concentrate on my studies... what the heck, i've come so far being alone... i can live my life alone!
CAREER
it's really pretty screwed right now... results sux and all... firstly, talking abt tuition... it's alright, in the sense, that my cousins did pretty well... i just hope that i can be more patient and give them a better perspective... chinese is still a struggle, but i shall try my best... piano, well, let just say that i have many students having exams this year... and some of them actually fail the previous grade... kind of make me nervous, and really stressed.... but i shall try my best... hopefully, can present a good report card....
INTERNET
this is closely linked to MAPLE... met lots of nice ppl there... and the sad thing out of this, i let it overcome my life... i look back and realise that i did not read any useful books, article of any sort... just maple... it's really sad... not that maple is bad, just that.... it can really take away alot of the realities... and the ppl i meet... nice.... this also includes online chatting, which, is really sucky... gonna cut down on it....
FAMILY
well, gald that all my family members are well and happy in a way... as long as we get along together, there's really nothing more i wld wish for...
FRIENDS
thank the lord for yoke, hwee min, hui qi & pei shan.... thanks for always listening to me....
that's abt it... hope the coming year will be equally great... in a way?
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